In Pursuit Of Happiness!!

"Hello, Its me", I Know 8 am is not too conducive a time to talk; but we need to...I need your help" she said. I knew she was in trouble and I also knew that this was the time I actually had to be with her.Immediately, I put off my stove thinking that breakfast can wait and rushed to a quiet corner of the room to listen to her. She told me how shattered she was because her self esteem had hit an all time low. Her husband constantly ridiculed her of not being fit for anything; her mother in law constantly compared her to a woman next door,and how she felt betrayed and cheated by her husband everytime she saw him with another woman. She also said how her husband said that it was against the norm to question a man in our society. Though my friend has had her share of grievances earlier too, this time, I could sense it was very severe. She was really broken. She had decided to end her life. I knew that I had to pitch in. Not that I am a great social reformer myself; but somewhere, I felt I should atleast share a bit of wisdom I had gained over a period of time either through bookish learning or real life instances. When on probing,she mentioned that she did all this because she felt deep down that somewhere all these sacrificing and compromising efforts would not go down the drain and how she would be acknowledged for being a great woman at later years of her life, assuring her of "happily ever after life". I laughed at her, rather sardonically; and slowly tried to intervene. I said, "Look, we all do certain things in life to be happy. We have all gone over board irrespective of whether the person is worthy of sacrifices or not.. But to what extent can one sacrifice is a big question mark!! There is no standard criteria for happiness. Do not let your present go waste hoping the future to be bright. Because the future again is so uncertain. Dont we all deserve a decent life my dear friend? atleast a life where love can be a give and take affair and not one sided? After all, it is all reciprocal in life. Oh dear, you were such a bright kid in school... v. good at ratio and proportions!! Just get practical in life.Look at what gives you happiness and pursue that seriously. " I wanted to say more, but she interrupted: " But,I seriously dont know what gives me happiness!! I am still in pursuit of it!!" I was talking to this very pretty friend of mine in the morning. She and I have been real good friends for nearly 25 years now and I think I know her inside out. Just wanted to But, she said that she is sad because she had not pressed her husband's formal shirt properly and that he had to wear a crumpled one to office. I asked her if her husband was upset with her for that and she said NO. I found it really weired because she was feeling guilty of not having done her job well. I found this really silly, but preferred to keep quiet and comfort her. So, I said:" Its ok na, there is always next time". Then, she said how big a failure she is in her life because she isn't as smart and talented as her husband, socialize as well as the girl next door and how her mother's gulab jamoons are much better compared to that of her's and how her husband appreciates her friend's cooking in comparision with that of his wife's. Honestly, I was taken aback for a while on this totally and finally decided to get some clarity on the entire thing. So, I asked her what was it she wanted out of life after all, for which she innocently replied: HAPPINESS. I asked: "OK", but, are the ones listed above going to make you happy??" She said:" yes, that is what my mom-in-law atleast says". I couldnt believe that this was my v. pretty, outgoing , intelligent friend who beautifully transformed herself into an amazing home maker and has been striving ever since to achieve perfect happiness by keeping somebody else happy all the time. I mocked at her ignorance and basked in the glory of pre conceived notion of being a independent, thinking, subtle social reformer. Then a thought suddently prevailed: But that's how all of us have been, right? now, Looking back, I remember doing things just to keep my inlaws happy,(though I dreaded house work after a tiring day at work), made upma for my husband at 3am(knowing that I would be asked to wake up at 6:30 again to cook); patiently withstood the hectic workschedules , crazy bosses, and so on and so forth. Then the children happened and it looks like your entire life has come to a stand still. Learning to say NO was a big deal and is still a big deal for me. Not that, things are any better now, though I feel I am a lot wiser with every passing year.I still try and overstretch myself to an extent where even a 6 hour sleep sometimes becomes a royalty! I feel like a glorified maid at times, but at the end of it all, when I ask myself why I have to do this: the answer is simple: IN PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS. But where happiness lies, is truly a ?? ...........Do you have answers?? But, ask me why did I do all this: I would say: In pursuit of Happiness.